go into a starbucks in NYC and say very loudly into your phone “this movie script is stale and trite! we need some new talent, someone with a fresh outlook” and wait
Potatoes only have a shelf life of 1month before they turn into this. #cats #catsofinstagram #potatoes
OK WORLD! I was challenged to the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge and I TOOK IT BY THE BUCKET SHAPED HORNS!
WATCH & DONATE! Even if you think the Ice Bucket Challenge is silly. You don’t have to make a video, but donate and spread the word. If not to ALS, then perhaps to one of these:
Breast Cancer -Always an important one because it’s a killer of women and women are the greatest. Not to mention my Mama’s had a go at this one.
Ferguson Wellspring Church -While Ferguson school is temporary cancelled, this church is offering free educational time and crisis counseling to children in Ferguson.
ppl always ask me “”what are you going to do with your degree”“ and “"if you wanna get a PHD how do you plan on paying for it"" and ""where are you gonna move after college"" but here is the thing:
i am very powerful and cute and im gonna float through this world one day at a time. please leave me alone.
I’m despondent & badly in need of a double whiskey. Such a sad day. Torment can create comic genius, but as we’ve seen today, it can destroy it just as easily. Robin brought my generation together laughing – now he’s brought the world together crying.Sorry, didn’t mean to eulogize. Suicides hit me especially hard. You’ve heard this many times before but it bears repeating – if things get overwhelming and you feel like you can’t cut it anymore, talk to someone you trust. The decision to commit suicide is made in the silence of your own heart. Don’t keep it bottled up in there. More people care about you than you know.
A Lazy Sunday with Lauren Scharf: HOW DO I DO THANK YOU NOTES?
We live in a world that’s all about lowest common communication possible, so something as simple as a thank you card/miniature scrapbook of thankfulness goes a lonnnnng way! I could’ve easily called this “How to be Granny’s favorite.”
Dear god this is everything.
A Lazy Sunday with Lauren Scharf: WATCHING THE 50 SHADES OF GREY TRAILER (so you don’t have to)
(unless you want to)
(like if that’s what you’re into)
(I mean, I won’t judge.)
(just don’t expect so little chest hair in the real world, ok?)
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The Purge III: American Vacation
By Lauren Scharf
An upscale British family’s vacation turns into a horror film when they travel to America just in time for THE PURGE!
My latest sketch from Top Story! Weekly!
Come see a WHOLE NEW TOP STORY SHOW tomorrow night at 8PM, iO West in Hollywood. Tickets only FIVE DOLLA! Buy online or at the door.